？？

有时候，我写的东西或许你们不了解。。我没有要求你们去明白。。
之前的那个文章根本就不是在说我放不下，请不要瞎猜。。
你已经是过去式，我不会强求。。
我只是希望你们开开心心。。
我没有坏到要去诅咒你们。。
谁不懂爱情是不能勉强的？？
不是我的，强求也没用。。
你们要误会我，我也没办法。。
如果每一件事，可以为所欲为的话，我就不需要去烦了。。
你们要怎么想我管不着。。
我不懂事情会变成这样。。
好好想想吧。。
有些话，说了是收不回的。。
我没办法让你们了解我。。
也没办法去控制你们是怎样想我的。。
我需要的是朋友，偶尔会为我着想的朋友，不时会去怀疑我人格的朋友。。
我是很想放弃这一切，可是我不会去做。。
因为我会活得更好。。

绝交

曾经我们是无话不谈的好朋友，
曾经我们是多么的依赖对方，
曾经我把你放在一个很重要的位子，
曾经我多么的想维持我们之间的友谊，
曾经我多么的在意你。。
那都是曾经！！
你们能在一起，我会祝福你们。。在同一个时间，我想我必须放弃我们之间的友谊。。
我没有你们想象中这么伟大。。我没办法跟你们做朋友。。
你利用我对你的信任。。
你懂我对你有多失望吗？？
我以为好朋友是什么都可以分享的，原来是我错了。。
爱情是自私的。。
在你拥有爱情的那一刻，你有想过我的感受吗？
你懂我有多难受吗？
我不甘心，不甘心为什么自己默默付出，却什么都没得到。。
不甘心你什么都没做，为什么你却能拥有。。
我讨厌！！讨厌你不会做人！！
不要以为自己很委屈。。我并不需要低声下气来央求你做我的朋友。。
你的事，我不管了。。
祝你好运！！！

懊恼！！

真讨厌！！为什么要换时间？下星期有三个考试叻。。都不懂要怎样开始读。。每个考试隔的时间又不多。不知道够不够时间温习完。。开始担心了。。这几天都在做礼物。。每晚都很迟睡觉。。不过，算了啦。。自己傻傻要去做。。现在快完成了。。很开心叻。。＝）哈哈。。
已经确定明年会去金宝了。。现在又得烦恼去那儿要跟住。。要住哪里也还是个问题。。跟朋友开玩笑说，没地方住，就在学校范围内起营，可以省房租。。不错吧！！金宝的朋友，帮我留意一下，看有什么房子是要出租的。。有好介绍记得告诉我哦。。哈哈。。

Life in Week 9~~

Wonder why am I blogging so that "early".. Haha.. Just finish up my computer system and application's assignment. Been worry a lot for the assignment. Worry cannot finish it on time, worry last minute work will sauce my lossing marks.. Blaming May for being selfish for going back hometown last.. Niway, sorry for being so not understanding.. I know is not her fault.. She miss home too.. Just that I am not last minute do-er.. I cannot stand the stress for doing last minute.. I am depressing last saturday.. Complaining to Leong about everything.. Crying out to release all my stress and depressing feeling.. I been worry a lot.. Sometime i really wonder, can I actually stand all the stress anymore.. Not mean to complaining about it.. But what I been thinking, if I dont tell, how people will know what am I actually thinking..

For me, I admit that I always take the responsibility with me for most of the assignments. Because I know if I dont push them to do the assignment, they will leave it until last minute. I tried not to give them too much pressure, because I know they same as me, have to study for tests.. When I think for them, will they think the same way back to me?? But this is me myself causing all this.. Haha.. Scare this and that.. End up stressing myself up.. I try to stand the stress, but I am human also le.. Will also complain and feel tired de.. Can I have a shoulder when I am tired?? Wonder.. I know a lot of friends care about me.. Thats why I try not to make them worry..

Now, finally finished one assignment.. Got one more to finish.. Political Science.. Still got time, so let them do slowly la.. Sometime also pity May.. Her work is the heavier.. Need to rephrase and translate the whole assignment paper work.. Sorry for being so unfair.. But your english the best among all of us.. Do it slowly la.. Because next week very busy.. Need to study for tests, do reports.. Try not to pressure her so much.. Haha.. What can we do now is.. Keep adding oil lo.. Until maximum..

Yesterday sat for my organic chemistry test.. Kinda disappointed with my answer.. Because what I suppose to know, I forgotten.. All the reactions, mostly I forgotten.. So I can only simply write whataver I think of lo.. I manage finished all the question. except the last question.. Can finish does not mean I can score, ok?? Trying my best to recall back all the reactions and mechanisms, then only realise that.. My brain is EMPTY!! Then, can only simply crap in the test.. Got write some thing, at least better than never answer ma.. Mana tau, maybe kena correct then go marks lo.. Haha.. Have to think positively ma.. Agree with me??

===========================
Talk back about last few weeks.. I read sister's blog.. Realising that she actually facing some of the problems i been facing.. And I suddenly miss grandparents so much.. I stay to miss home.. Suddenly realise how my parents actually care about me.. Although just a call a day, but it means a lot.. I miss my sister warm and touch messages.. Actually, I kinda susprise my sister's messages.. I cried when i read her messages.. Cried not because I am sad, but is because I dont know that she will really read what I wrote..

I thought of my childhood.. She used to be protect me when I am small.. I miss that kind of feeling.. Dont know since when, we dont really tell each other about our problems.. I really miss the time we have pillow talk.. Knowing each other questions.. I know you got a lot problems.. Dont all keep in your heart la.. Haha..

Dont know why suddenly talk about this.. Niway, thanks for the messages.. I can still handle my studies.. Dont worry.. If really cannot stand, I'll also bare with it.. I wont give up that easy.. It is my future, I dont want regret.. Work for the best and try my best to achieve what I want.. Will jia you de.. Haha..

======================
This week dont really get enough sleep due to the organic chemistry test.. Everyday study until 2-3am only sleep.. Tuesday practical lab supposed to postpone from 8.30am to 1pm de.. So I studied until 3something in the morning, think of that class start late.. I am doing mechanisms notes until that late.. And I can actually feel that my body cant take it anymore.. Because as time passed by, I start to feel headache, dizzy and feel like vomitting.. But I forced myself to finish it before I can sleep peacefully.. Finally so happy I managed to finish it.. But manatau when 7am that time, May called me..Informed me that the practical lab never postpone.. As usual start at 8.30am.. You know what is my first reaction?? Haha.. Jump out from bed, and shout what the.. I just slept le.. Now need to wake up pulak.. Luckily I never study until 5something in the morning, a bo me practical that time sure pengsan de.. So kelian.. Not enough sleep.. Then after practical, went back home and take a nap.. But then at night no mood study, sleep quite early.. 12something in the morning.. The next day, went to campus early to K book.. Haha..

Today, I sleep late again.. Kinda emo this week.. Maybe because too stress liao.. Haha.. Tomorrow going to sleep in lecture class.. My Cell Biology tutorial haven do le.. Tomorrow want go copy answer.. Haha.. Degree student lazy to do tutorial.. Realise that I never do most of my tutorial.. Must change liao.. Haha..

2 more tests(computer lab test and Political Science), 2 more lab reports(Cell Bio and Organic Chemistry) and 2 assingments(Computer and Political Science) to be complete in next week.. Jia you lo!!! Gambateh..
=======================

TT

Just finished my Computer System and Application Test.. Sob sob.. Dont know to do.. Thought lecturer will ask those common abit de question, manatau she go ask those pelik pelik de questions.. Crack my head think for the answer.. But otak kosong de.. At the end, me just simply write whatever I know lo.. The test result sure very teruk de.. No eyes see lo.. Haiz..
Exam half way, got a girl pengsan.. Dont know why.. Everyone so curious.. Include me la.. I somemore go 8, see i can help anot.. Haha.. But the friend dont want listen to our advice, then fine lo.. Go back my place continue exam.. But o.. Too excited or some how, I cant concentrate do the test.. No mood to do.. End up asking answer from other people.. Haha.. But not all la.. Just the fill in the blank de.. Blek..
Tomorrow got presentation le.. Me haven prepare le.. Sob sob.. Dont know what to wear also.. Haiz.. Start to feel nervous ady..
===================
Next week die hard lo.. because:
2 tests, 2 reports, 2 assignments..
I WANT DIE LIAO!!!
I am not robot le.. Need to complete so many task in a week.. Haiz.. Cannot sleep liao..

wonder~ing

Life going to be very busy this coming few weeks.. Need to prepare for tests.. Every week also got test.. See the schedule also headache liao.. Want study, but like no mood only.. Do alot of notes, but sendiri still blur blur de.. Everyday sleep late, but need to wake up early.. Want skip class but cannot.. Scare got quiz or lecturer checks attendance.. Alot to worry about..

Assignments come one by one.. One haven finish, another come pulak.. Busy solving all the assignments question.. Haiz.. The progress ia kinda slow.. Hope can finish it before the due date la.. Group members like so relax, no worry de.. Or I really worry too much a?? Wonder..

Want give people pressure, end up sendiri pulak stress up.. So useless la.. Start to work hard this week.. Do revision, do reports, do tutorials, stop playing.. Haha.. Because I scare to score low in my test.. Kiasu..

==========================
Sometime just dont know why.. Feel like to be alone.. Dont feel like talking to other people.. Dont like people ask alot of questions.. Just want to sit there quietly, think of something else.. Sometime feel like emotionally unstable.. Feel stress, but dont know where is the stress come from.. Communication break down with friends.. Really wonder what happen.. What I acually doing here?? Dont know..

Monday class started at 3pm.. Went to campus when other people were about to finish class.. Haha.. The practical was quite easy.. Food test.. But kinda boring.. Rushing to finish the report.. So cham le.. Because the next day have to pass up Organic Chemistry lab report.. Itu Ruey Shin la.. Said cannot copy terus from the internet.. Make me have to change my report last minute.. So tiring le.. Stress stress.. Finally done at 10something at night.. Then, Ah Leong fetched me home with bike.. Haha.. Scary le.. Almost cannot stand when come down from the bike..

When reached home, I am actually planning to study Cell Biology.. Suddenly so semangat want study.. Mana tau!! Saw a cockcroach in my room.. My first reaction was go to kitchen to take Shieldtox.. Spread all over the room, end up have to wash my bed sheet.. Hand so pain le.. Wash it with hand le.. My house no WASHING MACHINE!! I mean my house in Setapak la.. Then kena za by Ah Leong.. So chammm.... Whole night cannot sleep well..
====================
Tuesday class started at 8.30am.. I woke up at 7.45am.. Then, rush to campus.. Thought I will be late.. Manatau.. Actually still got 15 minutes before class start.. Make me walk like orang gila only.. Run and walk, sweating like mad.. But the practical was so teruk la.. Me just like blur blur, do not how to start my practical.. Sob sob..

Finished class at 1pm.. Went to Jusco.. Have lunch there.. Shakey's Pizza got so many cockcroaches... Sob sob.. Saw Michelle and Ah Leong buying food there.. We went to Ah Leong's house had dinner.. Then, Michelle they all want go swim.. I followed to go see them swim.. Itu Ah Leong push me down.. Dont believe that I dont know to swim la.. Play with me.. Kena 2 times.. Very malu le.. Continually 2 times loss balance.. Sure scared other people.. Haha.. My balancing ability in water=0..

At night. May and I went home.. Ah Leong fetched us back home, then Marcus come find us.. Saw Peat Peat in my house.. Then, we talk talk talk.. Until midnight.. Then, go yam cha.. Then, go back continue talk talk.. Haha.. You know?? End up...4 of us squeeze in the small room.. And I only get to sleep at 5something in the morning.. When I woke up, headache le.. Feel so terrible le..
====================
Wednesday went to Sungei Wang again.. Go there do nothing.. Walk without any destination.. Just walk around with Peat Peat.. Then, we went back home.. Staying at Prima.. Marcus teman-ed me go PV10 collect my shirt.. Went for dinner after that.. Lester followed along.. And we played poker there..

TODAY i slept at 2something in the morning.. Others were continue play 21 until 6am.. End up all skipped class.. Bad bad example..

======================
Thursday, I went to campus alone, sitting KTAR bus.. Itu bus drive in to KTAR campus area.. Make me sesat in the KTAR campus.. So memalukan le.. When walked out, saw Wilson.. So surprise to see him there..

ALmost late for class again.. Actually plan to listen during the lecture.. End up sleeping in the class.. Haha.. Today cannot sleep again.. Having bad headache.. Haiz...
===================

Mickey MP3~~

I went to Sungei Wang on wednesday. Went there with May and Marcus. Actually just planning to walk around, search for something that is cute and interesting. Haha.. Finally, I found one~~ Which is a Mickey MP3..

It got 5 colors.. But I prefer white color de.. Nicer.. But sister said will get dirty very easily.. Quite true la.. Silver color also not bad la.. Haha..

This is how it function.. Quite cute right? It is also something special about this MP3.. Different from other MP3..

Then, we went to ask for the price. The first shop said is Rm95 for 1 GB. Ok, fine.. The price considered quite cheap for a Disney product la.. Then, we went for second shop. There only sell RM 89 for 1 GB and RM119 for 2 GB. walk walk half way, see got another shop selling the MP3. Go forward and ask for the price again. They sell cheapest le.. RM 80 for 1 GB and RM110 for 2GB.. Haha.. It is getting cheaper.. Haiz.. But me no money buy yet..

And also that day, we went to makan at Sushi King.. Ordered Salmon Steak.. Sharing with May.. 6 of us all together eating at Sushi King and it costs us RM100+.. Haha.. First time eat Sushi King.. Quite enjoy and having fun there.. Miss it.. Haha..

After dinner, we went to buy Big Apple donuts..

Been spending a lot at that day.. Sob sob.. Cannot spend so much next week.. Haiz..

Birthday coming lo.. Haha.. Getting old 1 year.. Cant wait to go out with friends.. =p

This week is the happier week.. Trying a lot of new thing.. Haha..

Thanks to Wei Leong and Ruai Shin for fetching me home.. Haha.. Quite enjoy the moment that i sitting on the motorcycle.. Haha.. Think I am addicted to that kind of feeling.. Very hard to explain.. Just feel that when sitting behind, wind blow that time, you will like you can think properly, can see thing clearly.. Haha.. Understand a??

sick~~

THUR
Thursday that time, we went to May's room in Prima. Itu May May Yam Yam so blur la, lose her card.. The journey also not fun liao.. Haha.. Because very mafan without the card. Cannot go in or out without the card. Mafan!!

Then we went out for dinner. We ate at two different places, so funny la.. Chatting and had dinner there. Ate half way, head kena hit by some one.. Itu Ah Leong a, say hi like this, some more called me Miss Pig.. So cham.. But never mind because i called him Mr Debit Card, because he took the debit card form when I saw him in campus cafeteria.. Haha..

BUT.. I am sick on that day.. Sob Sob..

===================================
FRI
Friday was so blur.. Still sick, but still have to go to school.. No choice, cannot skip class. Me so guai.. Haha. Perasannya.. Blek.. Reached home, mum making kuih cang, helped for the whole afternoon. Me so guai le, but the real reason is.. I the only one left at home, so have to help la..

===================================
SAT
Sleepy~~

Whole day sleep, now still feel like sleeping.. No wonder he called me Miss Pig.. Haha..

SEtaPAk~~

Finally, me shifted out from home. Now staying at Setapak. Haha.. But my room very warm le, because dont have fan. So this few days i been tumpang-ing at friend's house. Wait for Marcus to borrow me the fan. Haha..

But abit tak biasa la.. Because all my house mates are damn hardworking, every time see them, they all sure holding book study de.. Haiz.. This really make me stress le.. So, I planning start study next week, after I get the fan first. Cannot play play liao.. My class fellow all so hardworking, especially those from STPM..

Me today staying at Prima.. Playing around whole day, never study.. All May's fault.. Make me cannot study.. Haha.. Whole day keep on eating only.. Now tummy not feeling well liao.. Sob sob.. A lot of food inside my tummy.. Haiz..

Just now went to the festival hold by SRC in campus. They selling food and drinks there. We ordered the pearl tea. Vern Mein and I ordered chocolate pearl tea, but itu May different abit. She ordered Mango pearl tea. Funniest thing is the fella incharge called May as Vivian. Haha.. So funny la.. We should exchange our name. Haha..

Some more itu Marcus want chuan me that Wan Chying called him. Blek. My boy boy also got called me, k? But he so bad la, keep ask me dont go back Subang Jaya. Haha.. But too bad la, because I am going back there..

Stay here so boring la.. Dont know what to eat also.. Everyday eat back the same food, sien.. Haha.. And dad not going to buy a new car liao because the petrol price rise again. Haiz.. I cannot have car to drive and Kien Mun dont want come find me because petrol price rise, sob sob.. But never mind la.. I still can be understandable..=p I am so good.. (Cheh, me so perasan le..)